Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Time for a funny

Hilarious house hold hint's from me :)
I have a friend in St. Louis who calls and asks so did you do your dishes tonight ? 
We use to motivate each other with these small reminders. But the other night I went into the kitchen to find the new dish pan I bought ,upside down on top of dirty dishes, on the counter. A light bulb went off in my head. I have got to call my friend C, What a funny ideal. So I called and I proceeded to tell her,  I know how to guarantee, you will never have another dirty dish in the sink again. She was like. REALLY! How? I told her to go buy a dish pan and sit it beside the sink. Then all the dishes will pile up in the pan.. :) Which leaves a clean sink. HAHAHA. She reply. Oh no, we will then have dish pan hands.  I don't remember the complete conversation. But we laughed so hard. And the dish pan was really a funny ideal. That lead to happy thoughts.

Have a wonderful day and remember to laugh and play.Photobucket

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

The power creativity

   I have used the power of a smile or laughter to survive the last few years. It is truly good medicine. I can not believe the difference it can make to your life. Find some thing funny to watch, Or create photos like the one to the right. I had a good day taking  photos of my friends son. When this image was taken. We were down the street from my house.And the abandon rail road tracks made a good addition to the images.   I photo edited the picture of him to the right. There are many other photos I did for him. This was for his graduation.

But this all boils down to I found joy and happiness in my camera, and digital enhancements are so much fun to do.

I look for happy positive posts to share on face book. When out in public, I smile at people, I do not even know.   But the point to this post is. No matter what happens, when you feel bad. You have to look for , or do something to counter act the negative feeling. 

As most of you know in the past I have vented on this blog. It was a way to release the feelings. I also went back and deleted some of the really bad ones. It was a way of me not reliving the way I felt when I wrote them. I found if you write a letter and express your feelings to some one. It magically, releases the way you feel about them too. You can either send them the letter. Or just destroy it. It helps you forgive them. With out them knowing anything. And you are in no way giving them a pardon for there past actions.Because this frees you mentally. You are no longer the prisoner of your thoughts.   The power of writing is amazing.

  This was a way to turn a negative into a positive. I can not believe it has been 6 years. Writing on this blog. There were also things I did not share here.  But I feel like I have over come them all.

Your positive comments have helped me way more than I can ever express. I am so grateful for you all.

I feel peace in my heart now. I learned to let go of so many issues, I thought were devastating.  And learned every thing is really temporary.  I learned to block thoughts. Not to let my mind nag me into trauma. I wish, I could explain how to do this. But is is just getting tough with your self. Not allowing negative self talk.

I also pat my self on the back 15 months free of antidepressants. My only addictions left are smoking and chocolate. And I do not wish to let them go.  Smoking is like a drug addition. And I can not express at this time my dependance on it.

I released worry, what happens happens. I am just an observer. Learning from this life.

Have a wonderful day and remember to laugh and play.Photobucket

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Power of thoughts

 What a person believes is who that person becomes. ~Bryan Stevens

This statement is so true. It all boils down to self talk,   The more we replay events in our mind the more we become what we think.  This also, is how depression  takes over your life. You get stuck in a boohoo poor me, or  victim mentality. You don't realize it, but you really do chose in your mind to hold on to the emotions. And some times make them worse. It is like a trap. Once caught you become a prisoner.  Some people never escape.  For me it took a melt down. Some people hold on so tight to there trauma, that they get offended if you even try to say, " You can be healed". They become defensive. Saying my trauma is so bad it can not be healed. 
That statement alone, is self talk. And will guarantee that person will never let go or be free of there past. 

But the fact is they can, if only they would  believe they can be free. 

Some people like to be the victim.  They enjoy the attention, and feed off of the sympathy of others. I know that sounds harsh. When you realize this is true. You will begin to see people who really do this. Then you will think to your self. Wow, she was right. Trauma and drama take over the lives of many people in this world. It is an addiction. Some like me in the past. Thought there would be no end of bad things happening. But I am here now to say. There is an end. You have to want it! 
And if I can do it, so can you.

And like any other addiction, you have to chose to stop. Drugs are not the answer. The right therapist may help. But if you think about it. They do not make money if you get well. So you must chose to be well. Learn to get answers on your own or with the help of a friend.

When you free your self it is like opening your eyes and waking up for the first time. You look at the world differently.  You know the answers to what is really important and what was just simply a life lesson. 

We were put in this world to live, learn and love. Every thing else is icing on the cake!

You can then sit back and observe. Knowing most things we take to heart are really irrelevant.  We give too much power to things that happened. And keep them alive with our thoughts, replaying them over and over. It is like falling down and banging your knee. Would you pick at the scab all day every day? And by choice have this knee bleed for 20-30 years. Mentally this is what we do. We keep the pain alive by choice. You have to chose to want to be free of it. Chose to let it heal. And there may be a scar. Or it my heal completely. It all depends on you. And how much you want to be free. It takes getting mad, saying to your self. enough is enough. I will not be a victim to any one. I will not let what happened rule my life. The more you start this self talk the stronger you will get. 

Do not allow any one to have power over you. 
There words or actions are there issues. Do not chose to take on there baggage.  There words show who they are not who you are. If they wish you harm. They are to be removed from your life. If they are not loving and supportive. They are just mean people. I chose to no longer allow words spoken by them to harm my feelings. I find when people try to bring others down. They simply are not happy with them self. And it has nothing to do with the other person. They wish that person to be unhappy too. 

It took an overload of emotion
Hit the bottom for me to learn to climb back up to this point in my life. It is hard to explain to some one how intense a mental meltdown is. But do you really want to find out? If you do not learn to control your thoughts. They will make your life unbearable. You blame others for how you feel. But, it is only your reaction to what they did that tortures you. Your ego mind loves to relive over and over things that make you feel bad. Till your soul wakes up and say enough! 

Ask your self :
Do I want to release the chains of mental torture?  
Do I want to break the chains that imprison my thoughts?"
Do I want to be happy? 
Do I want to finish this life knowing I am a survivor and not a victim?
Now make the choice to be free, and it will happen. 

I think my some of my next posts will be 
Rewrite the story of your life.
Tools to release your mind. 
Nothing is relevant unless you chose it to be so.  
I just found this quote

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.”
― Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi
This is Mental freedom # 2
Have a wonderful day and remember to laugh and play.Photobucket

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Keys to mental freedom.

 I now am totally free of all of my life's baggage. 
So, I am trying to share some of the key things that gave me this freedom. With out telling my complete life story. I hope I can help others to this joy. But  it took me 52 years of life to get to this point. 
1 week before Christmas this task was complete. 

     I got to tell my step dad every thing that I was told to not say by my Mom. We talked about her too. My dad said "you have no ideal what it is like to live with her." I giggled. "Oh!  Dad. yes I do." After telling him things like I met my real dad. And how I was treated as a kid. We crossed the line from family to friend. When I hung up from talk # 3 My body psychically  trembled. A feeling of joy and peace over came my being.  My chains of secrecy, fell of my body. This was the last thing that completed my mental healing. I am FREE! I am Happy! And I will never be chained again. To any thing that harms my mental health.

All of this takes allot of re thinking. Analyzing and getting to the truth. Changing the story's played over and over in your head.
It helps to get to know your self better. Take the  Jung Typology Test
This will help you understand why you are an emotional person or why some people are cold as ice. It take allot of time to learn all you can about his. But so well worth the effort. It explained to me why My husband and mom are the way they are. And Why I am not like them at all. Why my husband is content, and why I had to learn how to be content. Here is another link to learn more about  (Mbti
I am a ENFP And hubby is ISTJ   we are complete opposites. He is a thinker and I am a feeler. But I will not go into more detail on this. You have to learn from the experts. I am still a student.
   Next things I learned the last few years. That changed my life.

Choice, Is #1
 You can chose how you react or don't react .  I can now just listen, and not take on some one Else's issues. I learned to separate my life from others. 
The hardest to do was to let go of my kids issues. You have to practice self talk. "It is there life not mine, It is there choice not mine."  It is like cutting the cord. I know it sound uncaring. But it is self preservation. Don't make there issues, your issues. They have to learn there own life lessons. 

Chose how long you let some thing stay on your mind. The list goes on. As every thing in life is a choice you make. Even doing nothing is a choice. You chose to go there, not knowing what could happen. It is also choices of others. that put you in the situations. As a kid you did not have the freedom to do as you do now. But you have to chose to let go of things that were not in your power as a kid. Learn from them and chose the freedom of forgiveness to break the chains of trauma. 

Forgiveness is # 2
You have to not only forgive others but your self too. And realize, you are only the prisoner of your own thoughts. You can no longer allow your mind to relive the events. It is like watching the same movie over and over. You have to write a new script. And look at it differently.  
Example My Mom did not love me. Is a statement played over and over in your head. But if you really dig deeper , Mom did not know how to love any one, including her self. So it turns poor me into poor her. She lost out on what a wonderful person you are. Because . She was stuck in her own mental trauma. By releasing and rewriting the events. You are able to see life differently.  And not doomed to repeat this behavior. 

Acceptance . #3
Because you have to make peace within your mind. Accept it happened. And it is now over. You learned something which you can chose to make a part of your life or be free of it. You can not change the fact it happened. But you can chose not to let the event rule your life. Take control of your thoughts. Or they will run amuck. Chose to live this day forward in peace. You have to do allot of self talk . Affirmations, like I am happy with my life.  Reprogram your mind as if it is a computer hard drive. Reright what you can not erase.

This is a great statement . If you keep reading the last chapter over and over. You will never write a new chapter in your book of life.

I will continue this but for now. I say see you again soon.

This is Mental freedom # 1
"~It isn’t how you forget, but how you forgive, not how you listen, but how you understand, not what you see, but how you feel, it's not how you let go, it's how you hold on~"  Di Riseborough