The joy diet, what to do next.

I do not know if it is the weather change or the book Since the chapter on truth.
I have been changing in my thoughts. And finding it hard to be happy.
I have not wrote much just been doing art and not much more. I do not even have much to say to those who may call..
I found with this weeks chapter of the book.
It asked for us to list things we hate about people we dislike. And try to make some of it part of our life. I refuse to be unkind, mean. dishonest and unloving. I spent most of my life trying to understand my Mother.
All I can do is feel sorry for her loss. As she pushes every one away.
She gives no love so in turn she receives no love.
I see we are to analyze them, to understand where they come from. But I will not add there behavior to my life.

This book has brought out my suppressed negative side. That I got from her.
And I do not like being this way. SO!
I will not be doing any more posts for the book, The joy diet
This book is not for me.
I will so miss all the wonderful people.
But I feel out of control, like the witch I painted.
I need to take control and find some thing to look forward to. That will help me get through this winter.
When I started telling my self the truth, it became an issue. That I can not find a way out of. There is no joy in that.
The creativity chapter is a wash. And I am up to treats. And I think I will close this book and look for another.

I am sorry this is a negative post. But I had to tell the truth.

I need happy thoughts. And friends who really care.

Best wishes to all.

Desire

Desire is this week ingredient for the joy diet
This is a book bloging group hosted by Jamie Riddler.
I have learned from last weeks.topic truth.
I instantly jumped to the larger picture.
My answers to the questing . What are you feeling should have been happy.
But with the question of what hurts. This lead me to a negative level of my past.

So now I have learned of levels. Start with baby steps. With desire I am not going to jump into the top level of wants. I am not going to let fear of something big stop me from realizing, We all have desire. Small to bolder size. Just deal with the level you are comfortable with. Don't just jump to extremes Unless that is your true desire.


Anything is possible if you put your mind to it.
This is a fact.
In my past I have some how been able to accomplish most of my desires.
I had the perfect home for me.
I had my own business, and still do If I could be well enough to work it.
I have loving, caring, fun kids.
And awesome grandkids.
In the past I was able to decide what I wanted and worked hard to get it.
Or learn how to do it my self.

For a while now, I have learned to be content with what I have.
I did not want to go back to desire. As it was not possible, to make it happen.
But I have now learned. You have to have some form of desire in your life.
Or you will not even get out of bed ,with out the desire to go through the day.

I am thankful for this knowledge.

Here is my list of desires for this week.
I have some wonderful friends back in the St. Louis area.
But I wish I could find a friend here.
Any one want to move here? "hint"

Health, continued joy and happiness, for my self and every one.
My hubby to desire to travel and live life as he once did.
That I complete the renovations needed to this house.


Have a wonderful day and remember to laugh and play.

The joy diet week 2

On the menu for this week is the Truth
From the the Joy diet. A book written by Martha Beck

I did this after the first time I read this chapter.

I wrote down thoughts and feelings.

I think I have read this chapter too many times. Just to get the point of how this is to help me. In the past I was very truthful. And then found it better to say "Every thing is fine." Than to piss and moan. One of my past x friends told me most people really don't care and don't want to hear the truth. They only want to hear all is well with the world. Chit chat. Blah,Blah .
She even told her cousin to have her pity party at home. She did not want to hear any more.
"She has no compassion for others."
So I have spent a couple years now of brain washing my self to the point of happiness. I feel it and feel joy. I really believe I am happy. There is no reason to look at my life and say diffrent. As there are many with better & worse lives.
I have learned to live with the hand I am dealt.
I learn more every day to improve my life and make my self happy.
In this book "She calls this living behind a pain of glass"
Her questions for this chapter are.
What am I feeling?
What hurts?
What is the painful story I am telling?
Can I be sure my story is true"?
Is my story working?
Can I think of another story that might work better?

This chapter angers me.
Because I do not want to tell my self how I really feel any more.
I want to pretend all is well with the world.
And live happily ever after.

Now, I have to learn why this book angers me.
I am not the kind of person to get mad easy.
Every day now, I awake and think of new ways that I can see the truth deeper than before.
Like my life did not change when I moved here. It was just me morning the loss of where we were living. OK.
The changes hubby was going through, with his health.
The way I took all this personally. I chose to let it take over my life. Yes I did.
And this did, put me in the world of the lost.
This would have been a better book to read back then. Rather than now. As it is analyzing the past not the present. And I choose to live day by day now.

Please visit Jamie to read what others wrote on this chapter.

Have a wonderful day and remember to laugh and play.

Do nothing

That is the task for this week in the Joy diet. A book written by Martha Beck

Jamie is hosting this book blog event at
The next chapter: Joy diet every Friday..


The first chapter of the book states you are to do NOTHING for 15 minutes a day.Sounds easy enough.Not.
I can do nothing, in fact I am very good at doing nothing now.
But she is talking about quieting your mind. Like meditation.
tai chi works for some people. I have not learned all the steps as yet.

This is some thing I have never achieved. My brain never shuts up.
It is always thinking, analyzing, planning.
In the past, I have read books on transcendental meditation, but I could not achieve that level of quiet. I have learned self hypnosis. But when my mind quiets. I go to sleep.
This week though I was looking on line for Mandalas and I found a you tube video that hit the spot on relaxation. Link After that I did the Life choices labyrinth below. It was like all the pieces of the life puzzle came together. I already knew we choose our path in life. Every choice puts us on a new path. But not till lately did I realize we can take a step back and choose a new path at any time. It too is our choice to get caught up in the maze of the lost. When we feel trapped and depressed. Because we choose not to let the issue go mentally or physically . And try hard to recover. It is all a positive attitude of I can do it. I can achieve any thing I put my mind to. You may think you did not choose what happened , but every decision we make puts us in a new event.
Sorry back to meditation. I think the creativeness that I have been experiencing with art has been a quieting of the mind. It to is relaxing and a joy.
I find swinging on a glider, a way to still the mind. A relaxing bath. Listing to water run. Listing to nature. The birds sing or frogs croak etc.
So give it a try. Do nothing for 15 minutes a day.

I am thankful I gave this book a try.
If you learn just 1 thing it is worth the price.
Thanks Martha Beck , & Jamie!

Have a wonderful day and remember to laugh and play.